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<C>
Comedy (III)
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★ Comedy (III)

Ange, angle, his face is going all blue, look.  ibid.

 

Ange, listen to that noise he’s making.  ibid.

 

Angela, I told him this would happen.  ibid.

 

Sue, do you want a little drop of brandy?  No?  Tone?  Angela, do you?  ibid.  Beverly

 

The thing is I’m very fond of him.  ibid.

 

Abigail, it’s mummy here.  Abigail?  Abigail!  ibid.  Sue

 

 

How dare they say music hall is dead when jokes like that survive.  Play for Today: Comedians, Eddie, BBC 1979

 

He dares to see what his customers shy away from.  ibid.

 

A joke that feeds on ignorance starves the audience.  ibid. 

 

 

The good old days.  When hunger marchers marched politely and starved silently.  Play for Today: A Turn for the Worse, Joey’s comedy audition, BBC 1981

 

Your medicine’s too bitter.  No-one will take it the way it is now.  ibid.  Simon to Joey

 

Joey Dukes is my passport out of here.  ibid.  Simon to Marylin

 

There’s nobody in your way except you yourself.  ibid.  Simon to Joey  

 

He was at the club the way a man performs with Princess Margaret.  ibid.  Marilyn to Simon  

 

 

This is the second floor of our notorious headquarters here in the centre of Milano, notorious following a sordid little incident which happened here a few days ago when an anarchist under interrogation on one of the upper floors fell through the window.  Accidental Death of an Anarchist by Dario Fo, rozzer, Youtube 1.14.39/Thames TV

 

It’s no use trying to pull the wool over my eyes, sonny.  ibid.

 

You said, We were all having a jolly good time and he jumped out of the window.  ibid.  acting judge

 

 

But a pint?  That’s very nearly an armful.  Screen One: Hancock by William Humble, BBC 1991 

 

No more co-stars.  No again, thank you.   ibid.  meeting with writers  

 

The world’s their comedy playground, and that’s what I want to be, out there with that lot.  ibid.

 

 

Austin Powers trilogy: Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to my underground lair.  I have gathered here before me the world’s greatest assassins.  And yet each of you has failed to kill Austin Powers.  That makes me angry.  And when Mr Bigglesworth gets upset people die.  Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery 1997 starring Mike Myers & Elizabeth Hurley & Robert Wagner & Seth Green & Mindy Sterling & Michael York & Fabiana Udenio & Will Ferrell & Mimi Rogers & Joe Son et al, director Jay Roach, Dr Evil to associates

 

Austin, good luck.  The world is depending on you.  ibid.  Controller

 

Frau Farbisinner, founder of the militant wing of the Salvation Army.  ibid.  Doctor Evil

 

We will hold the world to ransom for ... one million dollars.  ibid.

 

Could I have a hug?  ibid.  Doctor Evil to son Scott

 

I just think like he hates me.  I really think he wants to kill me.  ibid.  Scott

 

The details of my life are quite inconsequential.  Very well, where do I begin?  My father was a relentlessly self-improving lingerier from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery.  My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.  My father would womanise, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he had invented the question mark.  Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy.  The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.  My childhood was typical: summers in Rangoon, luge lessons, in the spring we would make meat helmets.  When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds – pretty standard really.  ibid.  Dr Evil & Scott at counselling

 

Do I make you horny, baby?  Do I?  ibid.  Austin Powers

 

 

Austin Powers, International Man of Mystery, was frozen in 1967 and defrosted in the Nineties to battle his nemesis Dr Evil.  Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me 1999 starring Mike Myers & Heather Graham & Michael York & Robert Wagner & Rob Lowe & Mindy Sterling & Seth Green & Verne Troyer & Elizabeth Hurley & Will Ferrell et al, director Jay Roach, caption

 

Vanessa, you’re a Fembot!  ibid.  Austin

 

I’m single again!  Oh behave!  ibid.

 

My Father is Evil and Wants to Take Over the World.  ibid.  Jerry Springer Show

 

Dad is the Head of a Worldwide Organisation that Wants to Dominate the World.  ibid.

 

Because you’re not quite evil enough.  Well it’s true.  You’re quasi-evil.  ibid.  Dr Evil to Scott

 

Number Two: Dr Evil, while you were frozen we began a program to clone you: he is exactly like you in every way.  Except one-eighth your size.

 

Dr Evil: I shall call him – Mini Me.  ibid.

 

Scott, you had your chance, OK?  I already had someone created in my image – who is evil, who wants to take over the world, and he fits easily into most overhead storage bins.  ibid.

 

Let me present my spy in the Ministry of Defence – Fat Bastard.  ibid.

 

Do I make you horny, baby?  Do I?  Do I make you randy?  ibid.  Austin

 

I’m back in the sixties, baby!  Yeah!  ibid.

  

 

Very shagadelic, baby, yeah!  Austin Powers 2002 Goldmember 2002 starring Mike Myers & Beyonce Knowles & Michael York & Aaron Himelstein & Josh Zuckerman & Michael Caine & Scott Aukerman & Robert Wagner & Rob Lowe & Evan Farmer et al, director Jay Roach

 

Heel!  Come on, got me a Mormon.  ibid.  Dr Evil reels in Mini-Me

 

 

This is Natalia – she is my sister.  She is number four prostitute in all of Kazakhstan.  Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan 2006 starring Sacha Baron Cohen & Ken Davitian & Pamela Anderson & Bob Barr & Alan Keyes & Luenell et al, director Larry Charles

 

My name-a Borat.  I come from Kazakhstan.  Can I say a-first, we support your war of terror!  May we show our support to your boys in Iraq!  May US and A kill every single terrorist!  May your George Bush drink the blood of every single man, women, and child of Iraq!  May you destroy their country so that for next thousand years not even a single lizard will survive in their desert!  ibid.

 

 

Kazakhstan has become a laughing stock around the world … Since running of Jew has been cancelled, all Kazakhstan had left was Holocaust Remembrance Day where we commemorate our heroic soldiers who ran the camps.  Borat: Subsequent MovieFilm 2020 starring Sacha Baron Cohen & Maria Bakalova & Dani Popescu & Tom Hanks & Manuel Vieru & Miroslav Tolj & Alin Popa & Ion Gheroghe & Nicolae Gheorghe et al, director Jason Woliner

 

It was time for me to return to Yankeeland to save my people.  ibid.

 

Borat: Gift of Daughter to Mihkael Pence for Make Benefit Diminished Nation of Kazakhstan.  ibid.  

 

I prepare my daughter for market.  And I am looking for suitable cage for her.  ibid.  

 

‘I will never get to live in a golden cage like Melania!’  ibid.  daughter  

 

What is more dangerous?  This virus or the Democrats?  ibid.  Borat to rednecks

 

 

The man they took in?  Borat Sagdiyev, a disgraced journalist from Kazakhstan, who was looking for his daughter and a chance at redemption … This is American Lockdown.  Borat’s American Lockdown I, Amazon 2021  

 

‘The Democrats with this Coronavirus: I believe that their agenda is to try to take over the country.’  ibid.  Jerry, man in the know

 

The men take some time to show Borat round the house.  ibid.  

 

‘The Clinton’s are very evil … Then they drink their blood …’  ibid.  Jim, man in the know

 

This tiny woman Alexa that Jim and Jerry have captured …  ibid.  Borat    

 

I was put in jail for making my last movie film.  ibid.

 

Let’s hear it for gas ’em like the Germans.  ibid.  Borat entertains crowd  

 

 

Today is a special day.  I’ve been looking forward to this day for the past eighteen months.  Trailer Park Boys s1e1: Take Your Little Gun and Get Out of My Trailer Park, Julian, Showtime 2001

 

I’m going to live a good clean life.  I’ve matured now.  ibid.

 

There’s this guy named Cyrus; he just moved in here.  There’s nothing we could do about it.  ibid. 

 

I’m just doing a little documentary thing.  ibid.  Julian to Bubbles  

 

There’s a potential shootout that’s going be happening in the Trailer Park tonight.  ibid.  Jim Lahey 

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