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When the late Pope John Paul II decided to place the woman so strangely known as ‘Mother’ Teresa on the fast track for beatification, and thus to qualify her for eventual sainthood, the Vatican felt obliged to solicit my testimony and I thus spent several hours in a closed hearing room with a priest, a deacon, and a monsignor, no doubt making their day as I told off, as from a rosary, the frightful faults and crimes of the departed fanatic. In the course of this, I discovered that the pope during his tenure had surreptitiously abolished the famous office of ‘Devil’s Advocate’, in order to fast-track still more of his many candidates for canonization. I can thus claim to be the only living person to have represented the Devil pro bono. Christopher Hitchens, Hitch-22: A Memoir
We had the Pope over, didn’t we? The Pope said he loved being in Britain as most of his Nazi pals only ever made it as far as France. Frankie Boyle, Best of Tramadol Nights, Youtube
It’s some plan, isn’t it? With mass destruction, pitiless extermination, annihilation going on all the time. And all of this set in motion on a scale that’s absolutely beyond our imagination, in order that the Pope can tell people not to jerk off. Christopher Hitchens v Rabbi David Wolpe, Boston 2010
I have as much authority as the pope. I just don’t have as many people who believe it. George Carlin
The Pope says AIDS may be bad but condoms are worse. What kind of moral teaching is this? And how many people are going to die for such dogma? Christopher Hitchens, v Reverend Al Sharpton
Are you seeking power in the hereafter or are you seeking it now? It seems to me very obvious – the inescapable conclusion – that it’s temporal power that’s being talked about. And of a very dictatorial kind. Christopher Hitchens v Marvin Olasky
My favourite time in the cycles of public life is the time when the Pope is dead and they haven’t elected a new one. There’s no-one in the world who is infallible for those weeks. And you know, I don’t miss it. Christopher Hitchens
This Pope … spreads the lie that condoms actually increase the incidence of AIDS. Stephen Fry, & Christopher Hitchens v the Catholic Church, debate 2009
The Pope was elevated to God’s sole agent to lead the Church. The Forbidden Book: History of the Bible, 1997
At Clermont the Pope commanded the knights of Europe to capture what he believed were rightfully Christian cities and kill any Muslims that stood in their way. Rageh Omaar, Christianity: A History s1e4: Crusades, Channel 4 2009
The Pope was the official head of the Church in England. And gave Henry the title Defender of the Faith for his loyal zeal. Yet it was this same Henry that eventually brought the Reformation to England. Ann Widdecombe, Christianity: A History s1e5: Reformation
Pope John Paul II created more saints than all his predecessors of the of the past centuries put together. And he had a special affinity with the Virgin Mary. His polytheistic hankerings were dramatically demonstrated in 1981 when he suffered an assassination attempt in Rome, and attributed his survival to intervention to Our Lady of Fatima. A maternal hand guided the bullet. One cannot but wonder why she didn’t guide it to miss him altogether. Richard Dawkins, The God Delusion, cited lecture Berkeley University 2008
The papacy is not other than the ghost of the deceased Roman Empire, sitting crowned upon the grave thereof. Thomas Hobbes, 1588-1679, Leviathan
The organisation of the Hierarchy is a complete military despotism of which the Pope is the ostensible head, but of which the Black Pope is the real head ... He is the power behind the throne. Thomas M Harris, author Rome’s Responsibility for the Assassination of Abraham Lincoln
According to Canon Law the control of all property of the Roman Church-state belongs to the Pope, the supreme Emperor. Thomas J Reese, Inside the Vatican: The Politics and Organisation of the Catholic Church
For the Roman pope, by reason of his office as Vicar of Christ, and as pastor of the entire church, has full, supreme and universal power over the whole church, a power which he can always exercise unhindered. Catechism of Catholic Church #882 p254, 1994
Ah Constantine of how much ill was cause
Not thy Conversion, but those rich demains
That the first wealthy Pope receiv’d of thee. Dante, Inferno XIX:115
[sings] We will win. We have confidence. In the victory. In Good over Evil [rips picture of Pope]. Fight the real enemy. Sinead O’Connor
From ancient times the popes had declared themselves to be equal to God. A Lamp in the Dark – The Untold History of the Bible, 2009
The Popes have not only made claims to be God, but have insisted that salvation itself depends directly upon obedience to them. ibid.
The popes took to themselves the name Holy Father. ibid.
We are not the first to declare the papacy to be the kingdom of anti-Christ. Martin Luther
The Pope, possessed by demons, defends his tyranny with the canon, Si papa. This canon states clearly – if the Pope should lead the whole world into the control of Hell, he is nevertheless not to be contradicted. Martin Luther
I believe the Pope is the masked and incarnate devil, because he is the Anti-Christ. Martin Luther, Luther’s Words, Table Talk 54:4487 p346
I am more afraid of my own heart than of the pope and all his cardinals. I have within me the great pope, Self. Martin Luther
I feel much freer now that I am certain the pope is the Anti-christ. Martin Luther
I gave a speech about many things, and one of those things was the Vatican intruding in our politics ... I think the current pope is a very very right-wing pope: ‘In twenty years Ratzinger will be dead, and he will be where he belongs – in Hell.’ Sabina Guzzanti, Italian entertainer & filmmaker & political satirist
The Pope proclaimed that Mussolini was sent from divine providence. Mussolini: The Rise of Italian Fascism, Channel 5 2007
Ted: The Pope is God’s representative on Earth, Dougal.
Dougal: You’d think he’d be taller. Father Ted s1e4: Competition Time, Channel 4 1995
Associate: Our man inside the Vatican says there’s a plot against the Pope.
Michael: You mean he’s going to have a heart attack? The Godfather III 1990 starring Al Pacino & Andy Garcia & Diane Keaton & Talia Shire & Sofia Coppola & George Hamilton & Bridget Fonda & Eli Wallach & Joe Mantegna & Richard Bright & Raf Vallone & Frank D'Ambrosio et al, director Francis Ford Coppola