Martyrs make me exceedingly nervous. ibid.
There’s many a slip betwixt knee breeches and hip. ibid.
Professor Andrew Ackerman on The Importance of Blood Stains in the Detection of Crime. Rumpole of the Bailey s3e4: Rumpole and the Female of the Species, Rumpole erects bookshelf
Don’t you sometimes feel that trying to assess the outcome of a case is rather like sticking a pin in the Sporting Life with your eyes shut? Rumpole of the Bailey s3e5: Rumpole and the Sporting Life, Rumpole to judge
I have descended among you like a creature from outer space. ibid. Rumpole to accused
This is a distressing case in all conscience. Do you have to add to the disagreeable nature of the proceedings with the sound of you tormenting the English language? ibid. judge to prosecuting brief
Can I just phone my solicitor? Rumpole of the Bailey s3e6: Rumpole and the Last Resort, caravan bloke
The art of cheque-cashing is to appear totally unconcerned. ibid. Rumpole
Client: The modern world: What is the name of the game in the world today?
Rumpole: Space Invaders. ibid.
[Rumpole faints before Judge Bullingham] Send for matron. ibid. judge
Chambers must go on. That would have been his wishes. ibid. clerk
Do we really want dirty-book merchants hanging round the clerks’ room? ibid. Erskine-Brown
To the great fraternity of the bar. ibid. Rumpole’s toast
Where would I be without my anecdotes? Rumpole of the Bailey s4e1: Rumpole and the Old Old Story, Rumpole
Looks like something they put in the bottom of bird cages. ibid. Rumpole, re Muesli
No pleasure on earth is worth sacrificing for the sake of five extra years in the geriatric hospital at Western Super Mare. ibid. Rumpole to Erskine-Browne’ children
This judge is suffering from a bad case of premature adjudication. ibid.
We don’t shake hands: the customers don’t like it you see. Rumpole of the Bailey s4e2: Rumpole and the Blind Tasting, Rumpole to Ms Probert
Protecting working-class people against middle-class judges. ibid. Ms Probert
What’s the law on the subject? ibid. Mr Bernard to Rumpole
The funereal Judge Graves – second only in horror to the Mad Bull himself. ibid.
We all know what we have to pay for a fine Burgundy. ibid. judge
I am not prepared to sit here while you drink the exhibits! ibid.
Like all the chaps in the Ministry, we’re a 100% behind the bomb. Rumpole of the Bailey s4e3: Rumpole and the Official Secret, defendant
Oh secrets! In God’s name whatever would we do without them? But they leak to death don’t they. ibid. Rumpole to Ballard
I’ve often thought He must be a strange looking fellow. Rumpole of the Bailey s4e4: Rumpole and the Judge’s Elbow, Rumpole re God
Rumpole’s acting for the king of the massage parlours. ibid. Erskine-Brown to Guthrie
We usually shop in Marks on Legal Aid. ibid. Hilda to Mrs Featherstone
Sky Blue’s us – and that’s why they call us the Seraphim, because of our heavenly colour. Rumpole of the Baileys4e5: Rumpole and the Bright Seraphim, army geezer
I was thinking whilst you were away, Rumpole. Well I suppose I was thinking about all the things that I might have done if I hadn’t decided to marry you. ibid. Hilda
You never buy me champagne, Rumpole. ibid.
Like the two ends of a pantomime horse getting together to play Hamlet. Rumpole of the Bailey s4e6: Rumpole’s Last Case
He wandered lonely as a Claude. ibid. Rumpole in Pomeroy’s
The Private Life of Amelia Nettleship: Frolics at Hollyhock Cottage. The double life of a lady novelist. Rumpole of the Bailey s5e1: Rumpole and the Bubble Reputation, newspaper
A barrister, my dear sir, is a taxi plying for hire. ibid. Rumpole
Wrecking good yarns, members of the jury. ibid. judge
Why are you scraping the bottom of the barrel, Rumpole? Rumpole of the Bailey s5e2: Rumpole and the Barrow Boy, Hilda
The answer is not to do it in the first place. ibid.
I’m stuck for the rest of my life in Bexley Heath. Married to a Chair. ibid. Henry the Clerk
I happen to have a good deal of faith: the health-giving properties of claret, the presumption of innocence, and not having to clock into chambers in the morning. Rumpole of the Bailey s5e3: Rumpole and the Age of Miracles, Rumpole to Ballard
The more they preach Christianity, the less Christian they become. ibid. Rumpole to Hilda
He’s quite a big shot in the Cathedral – they made him a Canon. ibid. Hilda to Rumpole
They’ve made him a Canon in charge of ordinance. ibid.
Do you believe in a God who doesn’t do conjuring tricks? ibid. Priest to Rumpole
God’s against you. ibid. Rumpole to Erskine Brown
Also known as She Who Must Be Obeyed. ibid. Rumpole’s closing thoughts
Do you mean to say that this woman insisted that her husband sat with his back squashed up against the taps? Rumpole of the Bailey s5e4: Rumpole and the Tap End, Guthrie to Rumpole
The Lord Chancellor wishes to see you at your earliest convenience. ibid. valet to Guthrie
Think how useful I’ll be to you, Rumpole, when I come to work in your chambers. ibid. Hilda
I suppose it’s better to have no clients than those who are not satisfied. Rumpole of the Bailey s5e5: Rumpole and Portia, Uncle Tom
You’re not nearly so unbearable when you lose. ibid. Hilda to Rumpole
He was just caught in a trap, like the rest of us. ibid. Rumpole to Mrs Erskine-Brown
Doctor: Do you want to drop down dead?
Rumpole: Sometimes. Rumpole of the Bailey s5e6: Rumpole and the Quality of Life
It’s the quality of life that counts, Hilda. The quality of life. ibid. Rumpole to Hilda
You did it ’cause you had to be a character, had to be one all the time. Well, I don’t think that I can put up with your character very much longer, Rumpole. Rumpole of the Bailey s6e1: Rumpole a la Carte, Hilda
Arguing in public has been my whole life, Hilda. ibid. Rumpole
I find your restaurant pretentious and your portions skimpy. Your customers regale themselves in a dim religious atmosphere more fitting to evensong than a good night out. ibid. Rumpole to Chef
I often think that knowledge of the law is a bit of handicap to a barrister. ibid.
Defending trade unions, Miss Probert! Rumpole of the Bailey s6e2: Rumpole and the Summer of Discontent, Ballard’s chambers meeting
Never trust anybody who wants to slim down anybody. God rot all slimmers! ibid. Rumpole to clerk
This is the end of the line … I am taking industrial action. ibid. Hilda
Our jobs are at risk. The Summer of Discontent, I call it. ibid. Guthrie