I need to hire some new employees for the Barb. Strippers. I’m going to take it up a few notches. Trailer Park Boys s8e3: The Dirty Dancer, Julian
I should be out putting flyers out for my Shed n Breakfast. Look at this. Grand opening. I got half price on Kitty Day Care coupons. All you eat pancake breakfast coupons … Trailer Park Boys s8e4: Orangie’s Pretty Fuckin’ Tough, Bubbles
You should be wearing your crystals like Julian. It’ll change your life. Trailer Park Boys s8e5: Whore-A-Geddon, Barbara
Theresa, would you come up please and help a customer with crabs who needs some crab ointment. Trailer Park Boys s8e6: Friends with the Benedicts, pharmacy dude over tannoy
I wish we were friends, Julian. ibid. Mr Lahey
Come on, Randers. I’ve gotta boner for you, man. Trailer Park Boys s8e7: Community Service and a Boner Made With Love, Mr Lahey
You said you needed a full-on oil refinery, right? Trailer Park Boys s8e8: The Supe Duper Industrial Bubbles Honey Oil Inator, Julian to Ricky
Cross my heart, Cyrus and Sam are not going to get my 1%. Trailer Park Boys s8e9: Righties Loosies, Lefties Tighties, Mr Lahey
Do you know, Julian, right now you remind my of Kevin Costner in The Bodyguard. ibid.
It’s better to have a gun and need it than not have a gun and not need it. Trailer Park Boys s8e10: Crawling Through the Shitpipe, Ricky
I might not be hard as I thought I was, dog. ibid. J-Roc in jail
Sunnyvale Retirement Community: Come grow young with us. Trailer Park Boys s9e1: Why in the Fuck is my Trailer Pink? park sign
Ricky, this is not a stable environment for a young lady about to have a baby. Trailer Park Boys s9e2: A Stable Fucking Environment, rozzer
Everyone has to follow the rules, Jim, without exception. That’s how wars are won. ibid. Colonel
You’re not going to have your baby in a goddamned barn. Trailer Park Boys s9e3: Anointed in Liquor, Ricky to Trinity
My time at Sunnyvale has come to an end. Trailer Park Boys s9e4: George Green: Industrial Cock Inhaler, Julian
Oh for Christ sake, we look forward to Taco Tuesday extra week. It’s all we’ve got. Don’t fuck it up, El Sexico. Trailer Park Boys s9e5: The Motel Can’t Live at the Motel, old lady to Julian
I want to launch a three-pronged attack … We gotta get Lahey back on the booze … We have to devalue Sunnyvale … We have to increase the value of this place [motel]. Trailer Park Boys s9e6: Sweet Liquory Load, Julian
You will address me as Colonel. I did not do four tours of duty in the Gulf to be disrespected by some hairy-ass bowling ball. Trailer Park Boys s9e7: Piss, Colonel to Randy
I know what I’m doing, Julian. Trust me. Trailer Park Boys s9e8: A Dancer for Money, Ricky
It’s not the liquor. It’s the men. ibid. Sarah
The metamorphosis is complete: Sam is an actual caveman. Trailer Park Boys s9e9: Sam Squamptches and Heli-Cocksuckers, Bubbles to Ricky
A high-speed chase involving three bears: it appears police are in hot pursuit. Trailer Park Boys s9e10, The Liquor Snurf, Channel 10 helicopter news
Jim, you’re like a father to me. A father I never had. ibid. Lahey
Best of all, my best friends are all here and outta jail. Trailer Park Boys s10e1: Freedom 45? Bubbles
There’s always hope. If you’ve got the money to pay for hope … I need to fight fire with money. Trailer Park Boys s10e2: You Want the Lot Fees? Suck Them Out of the Tip of My Fucking Cock, lawyer to boys
Randy, it’s no secret I never liked you. Trailer Park Boys s10e3: A Three Tiered Shit Dyke, Barbara
I’m so impressed. You finally stood up to Julian. Trailer Park Boys s10e4: Shit Covered Cave Teeth, Lucy
It’s only a gunshot. Calm the fuck down. ibid. Ricky
I’m not going to lie to you – can I borrow your car to do a truck heist? Trailer Park Boys s10e5: If You Don’t Believe It, It’s Not Real, Ricky to Lucy
I am involved with a trio of sexually deranged maniacal rug-munchers. ibid. Mr Lahey
It’s an all-inclusive resort now, buddy. Trailer Park Boys s10e6: All the Fuckin’ Dope You Can Smoke, Julian to Ricky
This is ridiculous. I need the wedding money back right now. Trailer Park Boys s10e7: Up in Smoke We Go, Ricky to Julian, with Bubbles
This is one of the best places in the motherfucking world, man. ibid. Snoop Dogg, interview Channel 10
The Silver Bling Cowboy – I’m like a cowboy but a gangster rapper. You know, a hybrid. Trailer Park Boys s10e8: The Super Bling Cowboy, Bubbles
I’m fucked up too. I might have to stay an extra day or two. Trailer Park Boys s10e9: Thugged Out Gangsta Shit, Snoop Dogg
When something major happens like Ricky getting shot, you realise who you’re friends are and why. Trailer Park Boys s10e10: Looks Like the Liquor Wins, Barbara
I’m at fucking war with the squirrels. People think they’re dumb but they’re not. The little fuckers even know how to masturbate. Trailer Park Boys s11e1: The Jack Your Cock Furry Whore Slut, Ricky
He’s turned. It’s too late for him now … He’s a walker zombley. He’s not going to eat my fucking family! Trailer Park Boys s11e2: The Walker Zombley, Ricky aims gun at sick Jacob
The suspects [Cory & Trevor] have entered the residence of Marguerite Murphy, a definite indicator of the suspicious criminal activity taking place in Sunnyvale trailer park. Trailer Park Boys s11e3: My Facking Balls, My Cock, My Hole or My Tits? Randy to camera
Assaulting a police officer with open liquor. Take him [Julian] away, boys. Trailer Park Boys s11e4: Darth Lahey, rozzer
Rick, save yourself. Join me. Help me to run Sunnyvale. You have no idea the power we’d have. ibid. Mr Lahey
Brace yourself, boys. Jim Lahey is my father. The real one. Trailer Park Boys s11e5: Flight of the Bumblecock, Ricky
How do you keep your bags so soft? Do you use any special creams or oils? Trailer Park Boys s11e6: How do You Keep Your Bag So Soft? faux doctor to Ricky
Maybe we’ll invite Jacob and Randy along and have a foursome. Trailer Park Boys s11e7: I Look Like a Fucking Dick! Mr Lahey to Ricky
Randy, you’ve got an opportunity to talk to the liquor. Take the fucking bottle. We’ve been given a wonderful gift, Randy. A wonderful gift. ’Cause the liquor has chosen us, Randy. Me and you, bud. Trailer Park Boys s11e8: A Liquor Captain Never Abandons a Sinking Shit Ship, Mr Lahey
Oh my fuck, boys, we killed Lahey and Randy. Trailer Park Boys s11e9: Oh My Fuck, Boys, We Killed Lahey & Randy, Bubbles cries
The liquor is supervising the park, Barb. Trailer Park Boys s11e10: The All You Can Eat Shit Buffet, Mr Lahey
Look at that – Green Bastard IPA. Selling a ton of that to people in the park. Business is booming. Trailer Park Boys s12e1: Chlamydia, Bubbles
Thanks for helping me see things more clearly. You’re really good at that. Trailer Park Boys s12e2: Godspeed My Muscular Friend, Ricky to Bubbles